A Capital Visit

(5/18/05) - I just drove back from D.C. last night.  My brain stud friend there asked me to come up and visit so I did on the day asked so she wouldn't have to work and I get there and she's like, "Okay, I'm going to bed because I've taken this new job where I work 6am - 4pm and I have to leave at 4:30 in the morning because it's in Maryland."

"Is this just tomorrow?"

"No.  Five days a week."

"When did you find out?"

"Last Tuesday."

Only has a week to call me and say the situation changed but doesn't bother.  Groovy. 

In my personal time there in D.C. I attempted to find the Australian Embassy because there's supposed to be a display of sketches by an Austrian artist that later immigrated to Australia, Louis Kahan, that was in north Africa during WWII who made all these drawings of killed and wounded soldiers to be telegrammed to family members for identification since they didn't have enough film and cameras or something.  

I didn't know where it was and my friend left for work and logged off her computer so i coulnd't look up the address online or find a phone book so i figured some ingenuity might lead me there.  I hiked up Pennsylvania Avenue towards the capitol and there was the canadian embassy.  I reckoned these dumbasses might be good for something.  Hell, it's one of your fellow Commonwealth countries too, right?

I go in, the guy there makes a dumb joke: Oh, were canadians, eh.  We don't really like those Australians you know.

"Ha, ha, ha.  Can you help me?"

The guy was nice and called info, wrote down the address and number and then proceeded to call the embassy to ask where exactly it was since he'd never heard of the street.  I sit there for a good while and he finally says, "It just keeps leading me through the same menu options.  I can't get anybody on the phone."

I tell him fine and that I'm just gonna go look at the national gallery.  Outside across the street, where my cell phone can no longer blow up the building I guess (no cell phones inside embassies), I try and call the number.  I didn't get anybody on the line either but before I even bothered to push a single option in any attempt to talk to a person at that embassy the answering machine states in clear, intelligible english:

"Thank you for calling the Embassy of Austria.  For English, press 1 now."

I try to like canadians, I really do, and admittedly I know a greater number of Americans that piss me off but if we want to make it per capita, canada still holds first place with 99% assholes to those I wouldn't lead blindfolded into a slaughterhouse at gunpoint. 



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